To Green.

This is a non-fictional post and also a dedicated one. So those who are going to be reading, I would really love your point of views towards this post. Thank-you :).

When you don't get your dream college, you don't exactly expect to adjust to the crowd of the "not so dream college". Coming down from a well-known college to a not-so-known college can obviously be a mental stress. Of course with the "behenj-es" you might have to deal with and don't forget the "over-studly guys". Such a heart break. A college with bunch full of restrictions and so much gujju-ism is completely unfair because #1- restriction on clothes is stupid, #2 my crooked Gujarati improved which only my parents were proud of... which pretty much equals up to = a grumpy face every single day for the next one week until I meet the best people in my life. Well if I go in talking detail about how was the group formed and shit, I might as well end up losing interest of those who all are reading this. Let me just skip to part where it all started to mean a lot and when my friends became family. To get together you need one thing in common, and for us that was our mindset towards our college. Weird? Yes. Funny? Yes to me; maybe not to you. As one of the girls from the 8 of us said, "Maybe it's not our choices or looks or point of views for each other that got us together, but the dislike for our college is what got us and has kept us well-adjusted amongst each other." And when was the last time when she went wrong? NEVER! I am so not hyping about this, I mean it. Now because I cant sit here writing about everyone (don't worry in some or the other post I am surely going to bore you'll with that) I am just going to name the one who's post this is about as Green because she loves, no wait maybe did select that color on rather any other and she is weird, confused, takes time to pack her bags, makes me wait for minimum 5 long minutes when I pick her up on our way to college, puts up the best suited eye-liner, has an amazing dressing sense but yet again is a slow-mow, also somewhere a stalker because she stalked me even before she knew me but the best of all, she know how to make us smile. Even when she's not trying.

She used to be called "don" at her family. She's un-predictable and just when you think you've got her right, she proves you wrong. Green grew close each one of us by taking baby steps. My relation with her was completely different. We are two VERY different people in fact. Maybe here's the part where I can't explain why but we just are. It's like we are so similar but yet so different. For right now all that i fear is that she probably hates me, or she is really irritated of me and i so badly hope its none of them. According to the crazy family I decided to make, I made Green my daughter. Why? Don't ask. Result: She was the cutest one I could ever have! Green never misunderstood anyone and whenever she did she would straightaway apologize. I am the kind of person who cares a little bit too much for people and I tend to show it off pretty often. Green on the other hand maybe because of her choice, tends to like people for a particular reason and hate them for a perfectly particular wrong reason too. Now if you're having trouble understanding that, trust me, you've already got her. Was she complicated? Yes. A little. Did she ever deny that? No. Not at the every indirect times we've told her that she's confused. Green and me, according to what I feel, shared a very different and weirdly special bond. Not that we had fights but I had started to get insecure more often than what I would because of certain events going on in my life. Maybe she was going through much worse but I just didn't know about it. I don't even know if she will like the fact that I'm writing this post. But I know one thing that I have to prove it to her that I care crap lots for her and I am going to try every possible way to convey that to her. She told me that I would fight over stupid things because I kept on telling her that she has changed. Maybe it was difficult for me to yet accept the fact that she does have someone else apart from the 7 of us, 8 including her. My insecurity stuck its heights the day when I planned an overnight at my place and she couldn't turn up but on the same weekend when there was another overnight she could attend that one. It's a VERY girly issue i know but I didn't know the situation at her end. I thought that maybe she knew that I would kinda feel bad about it but it turned out to be a disaster. When I put forward my points on texts she misunderstood it for me probably yelling on the top of my voice whereas I was being really calm, for a change. And yet again, Peach like always was right, said that I could have rather had this talk in person with her because on texts its very easy to misunderstand the tone you're talking in. She is my baby and I care for her. Maybe more lately because I've taken the mother's role too seriously. Which is kinda my fault because I over-think. But if for once, if she looks at it from my point of view, I am afraid to lose her. Not just her but every 8 of us to fall apart. I have hard time keeping people in my life forever and she was there with me in all of my hard times helping me get up strong and move ahead. My attachment towards her had grown and maybe she didn't kept me to come out so strong. Maybe she did not want me to care THIS much about her because she's a grown up and she does not someone to always keep on reminding her that, "hey! yes you! remember me? i am here!!" maybe standing wherever she is, at a distance and yes to make it sound worse let's add a sign board to it which screams HEY THERE!! I AM HERE!!

Maybe its not that she had changed, maybe did yet still select that Green color on rather any other and is still freakishly cute yet weird, still confused, still takes time to pack her bags, still makes me wait for minimum 5 long minutes when I pick her up on our way to college, still puts up the best suited eye-liner,still has an amazing dressing sense but yet again is a slow-mow, also still somewhere a stalker. She will still always make me smile, but will I ever be able to give the same back to her?

-PriyaMistry

-9th Oct 2014.